Lessons were being learnt even as I lay cursing, pillow held firmly over my head, trying to blot out the vadhiyar's loud voice chanting - "MAARGAZHI THINGAL MADHINIRAINDHA NANNALLLAAAMM...". I knew he would come the next day as well...and the next....and the next. For the whole month of marghazhi the vadhiyar would come, in his moped, at the crack of dawn, to wake sleeping children up with his loud bell and staccato voice. The smell of ven pongal would permeate the house. Amma, bathed and dressed for the recital, would prod me awake with the long stick that was used to pull clothes down from the line, in order to get me to participate. This scene was repeated thousands of times over the twenty five margazhi months I spent in my parent's house. My distaste for pongal began, I am sure, from being fed the damn thing for breakfast for a whole month every year.
When I moved to America I lost the concept of the tamizh months and the festivals that came with them. Sometimes my parents or in-laws would send out a reminder email and we would make a half-hearted attempt to follow protocol. And then, the year that I was pregnant, my mother convinced me that my unborn son's spiritual life hinged on how much I exposed him, abhimanyu-style, to the secrets of vaishnavism when he was still in the womb. It worked. That whole month I tried to recite, if not all thirty, at least the song of the day. I found, to my surprise, that I knew most of them by heart.
This past month - thanks to nanowrimo - I've done a lot of reading about the temples in Mylapore, since that is the backdrop of my story. Again, I found that I knew about a lot of the rituals and that I, in fact, have fond memories of some of them. The mesmeric drumbeat to which Kabaleeshwarar is carried on the bull (adigara nandi), the pradoshams, Sreenivasa perumal taken on utsavam through the steets etc., When did I pick these things up? Since temple talk was constantly in the background when we were growing up I suppose I must have unwittingly soaked it up.
How much of what I was exposed to as a child did I want to subject S to? I can't conjure up a moped-driving vadhiyar but I suppose I could play some thiruppavai tapes in December. Would he get it? Is having a cultural context important? Is it possible to incubate a whole cultural experience in isolation?
I struggle with these questions.
I've decided, however, that this year I will take S to the early morning thiruppavai recitals at the local temple as often as possible. Don't tell my mother!
6 comments:
Lovely post Priya! Margazhi is a month I so love... not that I did anything as a child, other than wake up to the Thirupavai and rush to the temple before the crack of dawn for pongal prasadam at the temple. This year, I want to learn and recite the Thirupavai.
I think the best part for Atul growing up here is he gets the best of both the worlds. Give Sanjay the opportunity, and it's upto him to like it or not.
Best wishes with your book! would love to own it when it gets published.
Lovely post Priya! Margazhi is a month I so love... not that I did anything as a child, other than wake up to the Thirupavai and rush to the temple before the crack of dawn for pongal prasadam at the temple. This year, I want to learn and recite the Thirupavai.
I think the best part for Atul growing up here is he gets the best of both the worlds. Give Sanjay the opportunity, and it's upto him to like it or not.
Best wishes with your book! would love to own it when it gets published.
Sorry, not sure why the comment got published twice.
I will understand if you want to kick me for spamming your blog with my comments. I wanted to come back and comment on "Is it possible to incubate a whole cultural experience in isolation?" I have been struggling to instill the concept of divinity and devotion to Atul... he compares Wolverine to Narasimha. He is intrigued by Ommachi - They are not real because they don't talk back to you, he says. He wouldn't sit down to recite slokams, although he knows them too well. He doesn't look forward to going to temples. But he loves to have a picture of Baby Ganesha. He loves to hear stories of Prahalad. He likes to tell people that we kept Golu at home. I understand his dilemmas and his religious believes and cultural context will be very different from mine. That's ok, after all my believes are different from my parent's generation.
Spamming is most welcome, Suman. Comparing wolverine to narasimhan is the most hilarious thing i've heard on the subject :))))) Looks like he is picking and choosing the parts he likes best and can relate to just like we did with our parents. In my case I feel like a hypocrite because I was the rebel growing up. My sister was the one who towed the line. Ah, well.
In case u did'nt know the vadiyar, still comes home... nd reads the thirupavai every Dec..
Whats amazing is that I think he still looks the same - probably because for me, he was always very old person...
However what is funny is that he claims atrocious amount - my mom, however ignores his demands and pays him probably 10% of what he asks.
And instead of moped, he takes an auto these days... and sometimes send his son. His son is his replica... the only difference is between tirupavai, he gets calls and is dealing income tax matters with his clients...
Guess Andal can wait, tax matters cant :)
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